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”“Yes. It was great.”“Okay. So you didn’t actually have intercourse with her?”“No.”“Okay. Let me ask you about yesterday, okay? I’m just trying to help you understand what happened and maybe why. Why do you think you didn’t stop what we were doing? Do you have any idea?”A few minutes passed, but i didn’t answer. i was still upset, and was trying to calm down.“Okay, that’s okay.” He paused as if he were thinking and then said, “Let me ask you this then. Yesterday, it seemed to me, and I might be completely wrong about this so don’t get upset, but it seemed to me that before you made me cum, and again, I’m very sorry about that, it seemed as if you were enjoying it. Now be honest with me, and with yourself. Could that possibly be true? Think about it before you answer.”i thought about what he asked, honestly wondering if what he was asking could possibly be true. Chaotic thoughts were quickly running through my mind. i was hard, but we were watching porn. What about last night, i was. Even though my co-workers don't agree with me, they wouldhave to admit I am far from dumb. But there is always that unspokenqualifier, "smart, for a girl". If whoever reads this is female, they probably know what I mean. Some ofthe worst sexist pigs in the male gender are in the sciences. There areguys with lots of letters behind their name who can't conceive of a womanwith more than half a brain. If a male reads this, he will just have to take my word for it, that whenyou are in the sciences, looks actually count against you, so beingpretty is actually a handicap. I don't mean I would win beauty contests,but I don't look like a dog, and that's bad enough. Socially, the situation is reversed. Men don't mind beauty in agirlfriend, but there is something about a smart women that intimidatesthem. Not that I ever helped myself there, I was always too busysearching for a cure to my dilemma. There was always some new theory,some new book to read, rather than go out on a date. I am not.
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